ever been afraid to do something because you didn’t want to hurt someone’s feelings? you know that it could really help you grow, but you just hold back because it might be detrimental to someone else? that is me. right now. I know I need to tell my story. it’s apart of my journey and I know I can help others if I was transparent enough to do so, but AT WHAT COST? the darkest sides of me are never the sides I can talk to someone about so I just have to talk about it and share it with the world to whomever wants to listen. that’s therapeutic for me. I need that right now to hit the next stage of my life. it’s so scary to know that you have a past and that in order to go higher in your blessings, you have to attack your demons head on. I want to be the light for the world, but I am admitting that I am scared. Terrified!!! I don’t know. I just need to pray. I’ve been under the spiritual weather lately. I need a miracle. I have been dealing with so much internally that isn’t necessarily bad, but I keep letting it get to me. Things from my past that I thought I was over, but I’m not. I’m still reaping the consequences. I’m not growing, because I’m not confronting. I’m still hurting, because I haven’t allowed myself to feel pain. why do we this? Especially women. We cover up so many feelings to seem so strong for the world when we are ALLOWED to be weak. it’s actually our strongest points. I will get there. I just want you guys to understand that even though I try to always remain positive, I still have demons that I’m dealing with. Past demons. You are not alone. We are all fighting something and I’m just trying to fight the good fight! Pray for me.