the Queen in me

  
I used to (& kinda still do sometimes) sell myself short because I wanted to remain “humble” and not seem pompous or overly confident because ppl take that as being conceited. I know now that I am a QUEEN 💜 and Queens possess inner & outer beauty, gracefulness, good energy, influence, undeniable strength, and most of all – individuality. so what makes me the same as any other female ? I am ME! unique and my own person. so my King is set for me. not by mistake, but by fate .. I know this. so ladies, he’ll KNOW that girls like YOU don’t come around AT ALL cause you’re HIS! lol so embrace that shit and be confident in your Queendom! Young Queens 👑✨ your King is coming!! #iLowkeyJustReadThisInMyBible #ImTheMessengerTho #QueensAndKings #YoungQueen #iAmMe #imUpToSomething 💡

WOKE 

third eye awakening is one of the most painful, beautiful experiences… I’ve discovered so many things about myself. I am very cold with my emotions, but now long so bad to be passionate about all things. I am not a very good communicator, I repress my thoughts so I won’t have to deal with conflict. I am not sympathetic, but now I know that sympathy is one of life’s greatest pleasures. It teaches how to dive into emotions and completely immerse ourselves in them. I am strong, but can’t be weak, when that is really the only time God can use me when I show my vulnerabilities. I am a mess is what this all sums up to. I opened my eyes and now my mind to understand that I am gracefully flawed and now I can embrace every one of them with open arms, love myself, and unselfishly love all the people that are in it. third eye awakening, idc how bad it feels now, just continue to be good to me! 💜👁💡 #ConsciousLiving #ThirdEye #spirtualElightenment #WOKE #WorkInProgress 😌✨

you saved me

I am learning so much…. really just taking my days one day at a time and life is easier. I am so happy with how I am living. love everywhere. I know that’s all I ever talk about, but love saved my life. I can’t express the gratitude of how much I appreciate everyone near and dear to my heart. such a blessing to where I am from where I came from. ahh… Life is only gonna get better! & I am more than ready to experience everything in its entirety! 💜

this is it! 

what a feeling? LOVE!!! LOVE ELEVATED!! 

I have never felt love like this. love all around me. family, friends, all of my loved ones. all this love I’m feeling. It makes you feel whole and I do. I feel unstoppable. I feel on top of the world. Want to just thank God for taking me higher in Him. He allowed me to be where I’m at today in my womanhood. my Christianity. In love…. Love is powerful, man. today I spent some much needed time with my siblings, little cousins, and my aunt. We had such a great time and in the mist of everything I caught myself thinking (nothing unusual for me lol) but I was just thinking how deep you can really care for someone. to love a person so deep, you love them just as much as you love yourself! SELFLESS LOVE! wow. never imagined in a million years I would be feeling this way. Coming from a once self absorbed, bratty ass diva of a black girl who didn’t think about NOBODY but her, her, and HER! and to think that I thought I was in love before! HA! I thought, huh? this love I’m feeling now is the real deal. I just wanna keep going higher and really enjoy every emotion in its fullness. y’all better get you some! it’s so free and it’s EVERYTHING 😩

idk.. Honestly 

My moods have been up and down lately … Some moments I’m really high, and then the next I’m really low. I’m letting my thoughts get the best of me. I know I can’t be perfect, but I have to try to make these fluctuations in my emotions to a minimum. Ugh… I’ll pray 

small packages 

the greatest things in this earth are free. and the most miraculous blessings are in the smallest packages! …. BABIES! 

I was going to the 7th grade when I found out my mom was having another baby. i was the only girl for a very long time and the oldest so I basically got whatever I wanted , when I wanted, and how I wanted it. but my mom quickly knocked me off that pedastal when she told me she was having a baby girl. lol 

At first, I was nervous… Cause my brothers and I were already old enough and bringing a new edition to the family meant the entire dynamic of the house was going to change, but as the due date came closer, I was excited! Always wondering how she was gonna look, how her personality was gonna be.. Oh.. And how to change a diaper!! 😂 I don’t remember the last time I changed one before my sister came. All of my little cousins were already in elementary school. That was history by then! 

I was in my last period of the day at school when I got called down to the office to go home! I knew what time it was!!! My baby sister was coming! 

My grandma picked me up and we rushed to the hospital. so excited to finally get to see her. 

Fast forward a bit, I got to the room and instantly was so happy! She was sooooooo tiny! just perfect. I held her for the first time and was thinking how my life just got so much better. right then, at 13 years old, I knew the magnitude of this blessing! God blessed us with such a small, but such a meaningful miracle! 

Jayla Rose was what I named her. my little mini me. 

I can still vividly feel those emotions every time I tell that story. So I can just imagine how things will be when I have my first born! when the time is right, God will give me yet another blessing and another small package! I can’t wait! 

the need to be vulnerable 

when you hurt someone you love, you hurt. everything that they feel, you feel. emotions are so powerful. love is definitely powerful…. and apologies are the foundation to all of that. 

I have been a proud person for basically my entire life! I suffered a lot because of pride. when I needed help, I didn’t wanna ask for it. When I was scared, I hid it because I didn’t wanna seem weak. & I when I knew I hurt people I rarely apologized or if I did, it was half-assed because I didn’t want to become vulnerable. 

But as I am getting older and maturing, I understand the meaning behind an apology and also sincerity! 

When you apologize to someone and are truly genuine in your words, a person can sense that. it feels so good to have someone understand your pain or hurt. To sympathize with you and admit that they were wrong. it’s so freeing. 

just imagine if your significant other did something that hurt you… they said a hurtful thing, or cheated, or lied to you… would you love them more if they apologized and was sincer about it or just brushed it under the rug because they didn’t feel the need to talk about it. no apology, no nothing? 

of course we all want an apology! they mean a lot. they can make or break a relationship at the end of the day if you think about it. I would definitely appreciate that!

Never be too proud towards the people you love, man. They can be gone at any second and the hurt will only transfer to you. set everyone free and just apologize. it’ll be worth it.